In my opinion, a lot of people out there are delivering presentations that just don’t resonate with their audience. What’s the problem? I think there’s a variety of reasons for this, ranging all the way from malfunctioning technological devices to a poor quality speaking voice to plain down boring content to flat methods that don’t grab and hold participant attention. And everything in between. But the biggest failure of all is that most presenters have no idea how to really CONNECT with the folks staring up at them. This lack of connection is the number one killer for thousands of individuals attempting to engage in public speaking. Unless a speaker connects at the heart level with her audience, she and the crowd have wasted their time.

After years of intense public speaking opportunities, I learned something about what you have to do-and not do-to achieve that connection. I want to share them with YOU so you don’t fall into some very common traps that can derail your efforts. Implement these ten tips and watch your public speaking rating soar:

1. Get clear about the message you really want your audience to receive (before you start writing the presentation content).

While you may have twenty points you want to make, know which one is the most important. Then frequently interject that main theme throughout the entire speech. Keep on coming back to it so it sticks with each and every person listening to you. People have to hear something over and over again before they actually grasp it and integrate it into their lives.

2. Decide upon a length of time for delivery that is appropriate for the message.

Most presenters/speakers talk too long. Some like to hear themselves talk, and that’s why their gig last two hours instead one. Remember that you lose most folks if you drone on and on. Know what you want to say, and then say it succinctly in a way that means something to the audience. Using fifty words when you could have made a good point in fifteen weakens your entire presentation.

3. Use stories to illustrate key points.

There is a lot of wisdom behind telling stories to an audience. People are more likely to connect with you during the presentation and remember what you said afterward when you use stories that drive home your points. The stories are what stay with people days-even months-later. And along with those stories, you have stayed with them too. You’ve made your mark.

4. Begin your presentation with a provocative question, a shocking story, an attention getting announcement.

Start your presentation with opening lines that draw your audience close to you. Make them feel something. Anything. But inspire some emotion to surface in them within the first three to five minutes of your speech. If you accomplish that, you have them temporarily in the palm of your hand. Get them to sit up straight in their chairs, straining to hear more from you.

5. Learn the art of transition.

Avoid a disjointed presentation by learning how to segue from one segment of your speech to another. Maybe you just made a fabulous introduction, but if you don’t know how to transition from that opener into the body of your content, you risk losing the audience right up front. Brief stories, questions, examples, accounts of real life happenings, and personal anecdotes can serve as very effective connectors to a next segment. You don’t want the participants to be consciously aware of your transitions.

6. Understand that cool technology doesn’t build the connections you seek.

While state of the art technological equipment can augment your delivery in effective ways if used well, it isn’t the heart of your presentation. It won’t draw people to you and to your message. It won’t make you memorable a week later. It won’t impact people in a life-changing way. Technology is a tool that supports YOU. It isn’t you. So many folks just don’t get that fact. Recently I heard someone say his whole presentation was “down the tubes” because his Powerpoint wasn’t working right. The Powerpoint was only a support for everything he was planning to give his audience. But he saw it as the essence of his message. Technology without heart is empty.

7. Be authentic with your audience.

Being authentic means being real. Being who you are at the core. Being true to yourself in front of others. An audience can generally see through an act. Sometimes speakers pretend to be somebody they aren’t because they think the audience may not like them for who they are. This is nonsense. An audience wants YOU, not a shadow of you or someone completely different from you. People are attracted to authenticity more than they are attracted to phoniness. Stand up there and show them the real you confidently and joyfully.

8. Demonstrate your humanity.

During your presentation show the audience that you are indeed a human being like they are. You can do this via stories and/or allowing them to glimpse a few of your imperfections. People relate to folks who seem to be like them, at least in some ways. This is a great strategy for building that connection you desire. If you appear too different, too perfect, too polished, your audience may not respond to you and your message as you’d hoped. In fact, they may dislike you in a passive way. So “stand beside them” in your shared humanity as you talk to them.

9. Choose your words carefully.

It matters how you say something. Not all words and phrases are equal in impact and effectiveness. Simply describing a hair-raising drive across Montana in a snowstorm as “terrifying” is not quite as dramatic as sharing exactly what you saw, what you heard, what you felt during every one of those hundred miles. Using detailed descriptors that make an audience feel your fear and loneliness and anxiety helps to create a connection with them. In other words, bring them into the scene with you. Don’t settle for them merely looking at a painting.

10. Love your audience.

Yes, love them. Each one of them. Love them before you even see them. They can feel the love coming from you whether or not they understand it on a conscious level. Being able to feel it, though, is very powerful. This love builds a connection between them and you. Imagine holding each person in the palm of your hand as you deliver your speech. Silently dedicate your message to each individual’s highest good.

If you’ve ever had one of those, if anything could go wrong days it will, you’ll appreciate what happened to me. Recently, I was slated to do a major presentation for a new client. Actually, it was the second of two presentations. Since the first one went well, I thought the second one would be even better, since I had a better of idea of what the client wanted to achieve. As is my practice, I made sure to arrive early- just because it’s always nice to feel calm and collected, have time to set up and so on.

Since I had been to this client’s offices before, I knew it wasn’t a long walk from my car. Although I don’t usually wear really high heels, I decided I would; I really wanted to look my best. Having checked all details regarding location, time, etc. of the presentation before I left, I was sure I knew exactly where I was going. But when I arrived at the room assigned to me, I discovered the venue had been moved. And no one seemed to know the new location.

Had there been a video camera tailing me, it would have looked like a scene from a comical movie. There I was running around- up to the 14th floor, down to the 11th, multiple phone calls and emails. All the while, time was ticking down to the start of my presentation. Fortunately, I connected with someone who knew in which room I was supposed to present. How grateful I felt! But, it wasn’t just another room; it was in an entirely different building! Thankfully, this building was only minutes away. As you can imagine, it was rather challenging to maintain a sense of “calm and collectedness” as I jogged over as fast as my heels would allow. Then, to add to my stress, I discovered, once I was there, that my Power Point presentation (for technical reasons beyond my control) would not work.

What would you do at this point? Burst into tears; stamp your foot while toweling off your sweaty, anxious face or just give up? Not any of these, if you want to make it work for your new client. You do what I did: take a deep breathe; stop; and think on your feet. And you follow these 3 tips for performing under pressure.

The Language Lab’s top three tips for performing under pressure

1. Be mentally prepared: The fact is, anything can go off plan during a presentation. “Expect the unexpected” should be one of your mantras. The only way to handle curve balls is by being mentally prepared for what you can control. Even though I would have preferred making my presentation with the Power Point visuals, I had no problem going through the presentation without them. I knew the content, virtually by heart.

2. Improvise: I may not be Jonathan Winters and Robin Williams, masters of improvisation. But having taught in a classroom for years, as well as working as a business presenter, I’ve learned how important it is to go with the flow. Even if you don’t have this type of professional experience, there are plenty of daily life activities on which to draw that will help you think faster on your feet. Imagine, for example, you’re at a dinner party. The total stranger across the table says something to you that catches you by surprise. You take a moment; then respond. You move the conversation forward, in the way you see fit. This is what happens in any pressured circumstance. You advance the situation so that the tension eases or a solution presents itself. One of the keys to improvisation, as CNN’s Real Simple Life Coach, Gail Blanke points out is to simply always think of adding something new to the conversation.

3. Trust your instincts: So much about thinking on your feet is really trusting your instincts. That first thought that comes to mind is usually your best one. And if isn’t, move onto the next idea. Responding to your gut instinct and speaking up will help avoid that “brain freeze.” And don’t be too hard on yourself if you do come up blank. We’re all overcome with nerves at some point. Divert your mental energy to another person, or to the situation – anything other than thinking about yourself and your tongue-tied moment!

You can find more tips on how to think on your feet at sites such as Mind Tools and Think on Your Feet.

If you’ve ever experienced a time when you needed to think on your feet under pressure, what did you do that helped?

We give a sales presentation to our warm prospects who respond to our mini-marketing message. Our mini marketing message was given during our networking calls or through our advertising. These mini marketing messages are meant to get our prospect asking for more and our sales presentation is the more that they will get. Sales presentations are typically used to get the prospect to the point of buying the product or service, though they may still have questions or objections after the sales presentation. A good salesperson will be able to handle any questions or objections the prospect may have, as unusual as they may be.

There are many ways to present a product sales presentation. You can give a stand up speech with slide show, you can give the prospect a video or brochure, or you can have a web site that gives your product demonstration. The easier on the prospect is usually the best, as their time is valuable to them. In my opinion, a web site is usually the easiest on a prospect.

A good sales presentation will provide product features and benefits, reasons to buy over competitive products, common questions and answers, and reasons to buy from your company over others. You can tailor your presentation to the prospect, giving them a quicker presentation unless they ask for more detail. You can also build on your presentation by getting feedback from your prospects and using their suggestions to improve the presentation.

On a web site, keep the presentation concise but give the visitor the option of looking deeper into the details. The more details you can offer online, the more the prospect will feel comfortable buying the product. You can give technical details on how the product was invented, who the inventors were and their biographies, and details about the company that manufactures it. You can show the product label, the packaging, and the raw product. You can give testimonials and show people using the product. Feel free to use your imagination to provide your potential customer with anything you think may be relevant.

At the end of your sales presentation, you must give your customer a way to buy. The easier it is for them to buy the product the better. We used to take orders from our website, by 800 number, and by fax. We allowed the customer to pay with credit card or send in a check. Again, the easier you can make it the better. If you are doing a personal product demonstration, you can simply ask for an order.

Sometimes your customer will continue to have doubts about purchasing your product. If this is the case, you can give your prospect samples or offer a trial discount on the product, if the product is consumable. You could also offer a guarantee or free trial on the product, which could work even if the product is not consumable.

Our goal for the sales presentation is to provide enough information to the potential customer so that they can make a buying decision. The better we can make our presentation fit this goal, the easier it will be to make the sale.

Events, parties, and even seminars tend to go smoother and turn out more successful if there is a seasoned presenter in charge of the hosting duties. This is because a presenter can make a detailed program which has to be followed by the speakers, guests, attendees and other people who will be participating or joining the event. This program or schedule of activities will enable the event to transition smoothly from one activity to another. Having a presenter will also help the event look more professionally planned. A professional presenter will eliminate “dead air” and boring moments as well. Finally, a seasoned presenter will know how to deal with or manage certain snags or difficulties that can come up during the event such as some technical problems or the absence of a key speaker.

If you don’t have a skilled and well-experienced presenter in your pool to handle the hosting duties for an event you are planning for, you can hire a freelance presenter or emcee. To make sure that you will be hiring the best one for your particular event, below are some helpful tips you can follow:

Know your intended audience. Before hiring a freelance presenter, you need to know who the audience or guests will be at your event. By doing so, you can find a speaker who can best understand and empathize with your audience and provide the solution or entertainment that they are looking for.

Look into the communication and hosting style of the presenter. Communication and hosting styles usually vary greatly among professional presenters. Some have a great sense of humor, while others prefer to get right to business. Once again, you will have to consider your audience’s expectations before selecting your presenter. Decide what communication and hosting style would work best for your audience and find a presenter who can successfully deliver.

Take into account the presenter’s professional background and accomplishments. In general, people don’t want to hear from a presenter who doesn’t have anything meaningful to say. As such, you have to look carefully at the resumes of every emcee that you are considering. They should possess relevant experiences and achievements that would make them an excellent presenter.

Lastly, request for a sample presentation. It is always a good idea to see the presenter in action before making your final decision. You can check out their website to see if they have any videos from prior events. You can also try attending one of their other events. This would be a great way for you to see how the emcee interacts with a live audience.

PowerPoint is an application that has been around for quite some time now and has become an indispensable application by Microsoft. It is very useful in making presentations, hence the name, because it incorporates text and media files that can all be put into a single document. This can be displayed according to one’s convenience, as a lot of options are available for the process of creating a PowerPoint presentation.

However, these presentations can also be shared on the web and even downloaded. There are many websites designed specifically for this purpose. To upload your presentations you need to first create an account in the website. After uploading, you can simply send the link of your presentations available on that website to whoever you wish to see it.

After having created your PowerPoint presentation, you should save it as a webpage. Simply select the ‘save as’ option from the list of options available under ‘file’ and save it as a webpage. Now upload this into the account you have created on the site specifically designed for uploading and sharing PPT presentations.

You can also upload your PPT presentation in video sharing websites though you have to convert your presentation file to a.mov or.flv file using Windows MovieMaker. Sharing your presentation in video sharing websites gets you a larger viewership on the Internet.

Downloading PowerPoint presentations should also not be a problem as most PowerPoint presentation sharing websites, as well as video sharing websites, have applications that allow free downloading or downloading with a nominal monthly membership.

However there is one word of caution. If you do not wish viewers to use or reproduce your PowerPoint presentations but you simply want to showcase your work, then do mention your rights to your original work, or get your work copyrighted.

Also, create a separate email address with which you shall create your account with the PowerPoint presentations sharing website. Even though websites promise privacy, you risk getting your email address sold to junk email senders. Also, you don’t want to be disturbed by spam mail, and so getting a separate email address meant specifically for this is a good idea.

You can also create PowerPoint presentations online, though you get the software as you buy the Windows Vista operating system. You also get the PowerPoint presentations software on older versions of the Windows operating system.

Why upload your PowerPoint Presentations for online viewing in the first place? Because the Internet gives you fantastic and free platform and exposure for your work. You also get to view work created by people like yourself, also for free and thus create a global community of people who create original work. Or, you can simply appreciate these intelligent and creative projects, often made at a limited budget using applications on a home computer. However, despite the free availability of these creative efforts, it is piracy to download these presentations and videos without due permission from the creator and author of the work.

For example, when your child wants a bar of chocolate, you would tell your child to finish up his or her homework and would reward him or her with the bar of chocolate if it were being carried out.
That is negotiation. When you are supposed to meet your friends for dinner but you have to be running late because you are still caught up at work. You inform them to let you know where they will be heading to for dinner, and inform them that you will meet up with them at the place itself right after work.
That is negotiation.

You need to take a day leave for a family occasion such as a wedding or an emergency, but your boss still requires you to station at work to complete a task before the due date.

You still need to inform him or her the importance of you taking your leave, but instead of a day of leave, you can request for half a day of leave, or time-off. In this way, you most probably would be able to complete your task on time, and yet manage to attend to the important matters arising your family. That is negotiation. But whether it is a business negotiation or a personal negotiation, you would still need to acquire the imperative negotiation skills. In the context of negotiation, you are supposed to come to a consensus between you and the other party.

In the end, it becomes a win-win situation for both parties. So what does it take to achieve this? When making business dealings, the first thing you are most encouraged to do is pre-negotiation.

This is where you make preparations as to your purpose of negotiation and what you wish to achieve at the end of it. This can be done by means of writing.
You should also include the possible queries that the other party could bombard you with. This can contribute to a more professional way of settling the matter.

Most importantly, to make certain that the negotiation runs smoothly, you must display your confidence and authority. But that does not mean you control every single thing that revolves around the matter. Remember, you want to come to a consensus with the other party.

Let’s take the previous example of your child wanting a bar of chocolate and you wanting him or her to finish his or her homework. Do you want your child to keep bugging you for the chocolate? Do you want your child to take full control of you all the time? I don’t think so. So this is where you get a little but authoritative and appear confident of what you are doing. You do not feel like you are doing any harm to him or her. You just want him or her to finish the homework.

But at the same time, even you should not take full control of your child’s actions. Your child should not be deprived of his or her likings for chocolates. So you come up with a ‘deal’. You make sure that the child does his or her homework. Take a look at his or her workbook. Can you see that the homework is done prim and proper? If that is the case, like you have promised, you would buy him or her the bar of chocolate.

So are you both gaining from this? Yes.The child gets the chocolate, while you feel relieved that the child has completed the homework. There you have it! A win-win situation.

The same concept applies when making business dealings.
Let us say… you are a salesperson who promoted an oven for sale. You even conducted a demo on how effective the oven is by baking a cake.

A customer, upon viewing the demo, seems keen on it and wishes to buy the oven from you. A purchase is then made, and the receipt has been given.The next day or two, the same customer comes back and files a complaint about the oven, claiming that the oven is not working the way you had explained and demonstrated.

In view of the matter, the customer returns the receipt and demands for a money refund.

Would you abide by the customer’s demands and let yourself lose the profits that you initially gained, or would you find an idea to resolve the matter, such that both you and the customer would head for home happy?

You would prefer the second option right? But how does it work then? What you can do is to conduct another demonstration of the cake baking, but this time, use the oven that was bought by the customer. See the results! Is it a positive or negative one? If it were positive, the customer would have no reason to return the oven back right? Then discuss with the customer as to why the cake did not turn out even though the oven was working as normal. You can probably suggest to her that she could have forgotten an important ingredient in the cake. Maybe baking powder!

If that is true, you can confidently explain to her that she needs to include baking powder so that the cake will rise the way it should be. Well, that sounds as if she lost the case. But you should not make her feel like a loser. Instead, do something that can make her even at an advantage. Give her a free recipe book customized by the company you are working in that consists of all the tasty cakes that she can try to bake back home.

So there you have it! Another win-win situation. She still gets to keep the oven and also a free recipe book that allows her to try other varieties of cakes, and you get to keep the profits gained from the sale and best of all, convince her once again that your oven is constantly of high quality! The art of negotiation is never a piece of cake, but if you can acquire the confidence and power to settle a matter, the negotiation can be carried out smoothly and effectively.

How many Sales people really understand NEGOTIATION? Sadly too few.

Many enter the negotiation cycle without realizing they are in a critical part of the Sales Process… and if you are a sales person, and unable to determine where the boundaries are, read on.

NEGOTIATION, when used well is a highly powerful Sales Tool, but how many of us really use it to best effect? How many Sales people are 100% prepared when it comes to negotiation. Not many.

Indeed negotiation is not always related to Sales situations. For example we have all had the discussions with our siblings along the line of: “Can you take me to the pictures tomorrow?”, responding with: “Only if you tidy your bedroom”. Indeed a primitive, but often effective negotiation, and indeed one (if carried out) can lead to a ‘win – win’ outcome!

It is vitally important to recognize when the sales process enters the ‘negotiation phase’. Failure to recognise this may be detrimental to your desired outcome, and do the salesman a disservice.

So, what is negotiation?

I have over the years heard many definitions, but the simple ones are always the best:

“The exchange of tradables to facilitate an agreement”.

Simple!

And what are tradables? And more importantly, how many sales men can list them?

Tradables are the areas where a Salesman or a Buyer can ‘give a little’. The obvious one is price, or more accurately, cost of goods/service. But there are many others too. They can include aspects such as product/service specification, payment terms, delivery and quantity.

Let us look at some sales examples.

The buyer says “Yes, I like the look of your resistors, and if you can get the price down by 10% then we can do business.”

The inexperienced salesman, who does not realise that the negotiation phase has just been entered is inclined to say “Yes” in great haste to close a deal. However, the more experienced salesman who has a clear understanding of his tradables may respond in one of the following ways:

“Of course, but I will need you to commit to a 12 month agreement for me to guarantee this price”

or

“We can meet this price, but we will have to provide the product without the wired connectors”

Another example would be:

Buyer – “If you can guarantee delivery by the end of the month then we can place an order now”.

Again, the inexperienced may jump at the offer, but the more measured approach would be: “Of course, but we will need to engage our team in overtime to meet the deadline, therefore it will attract a 10% price premium”.

Salesmen naturally believe that the Buyer has a the upper hand, particularly as he may have a choice of suppliers. However, if you have reached the negotiation phase, it can be assumed you are winning the competitive battle. At this point the sales man should never underestimate the strength of his proposition.

It is not unknown for a negotiation to break down irretrievably, although with thorough preparation by both sides, this is an unlikely outcome.

The outcome of a negotiation and subsequent business deal fall into three categories. The first, a ‘win – win’ is the most desirable, both sides feel good about what has been achieved, and it is a great foundation for further business between the two parties.

A ‘win – lose’ is where one company is delighted with the deal, and the other is regretting the agreement, and feeling ‘stitched up’. Frequently the ‘delighted party’ is oblivious of the thoughts of the ‘aggrieved party’. In this case, unless some remedial work can be done on the relationship, it is highly unlikely that the parties will do business together.

The final outcome is a “lose – lose” outcome. Both parties feel the deal was poor, and such outcomes should be avoided at all costs. However, they do happen due to business pressures, expediency and other compelling issues. Indeed it is highly unlikely that these parties will do business again with each other.

So how do we ensure that outcomes are ‘win – win’.

Simple – preparation is key. A salesman MUST know and understand his tradables. A buyer may have different tradables depending on what he is buying. Both parties must accept that transaction value can be talked up as well as down.

Typical tradables for a salesman would be (and these can be traded up and down):

Delivery time

Order value

Quantity

Contract duration

Product finish (specification)

Packaging

Packing and delivery costs

Insurance cover

Delivery frequency

Payment terms

In summary, the best salesmen recognize their tradables, they can recite them at a moments notice, and they recognize the simple signs of negotiation. Furthermore, they have an empathy to the needs of their customer in order that all outcomes are ‘win – win.’

Happy Selling.

Many people have little knowledge about the debt negotiation process, which scares off many from taking advantage of the benefits it has to offer. The process can be overwhelming and finding the right answers for your questions is not always easy. Further, consumers are advised against negotiating with creditors until they have reviewed some basic information about the process and the best way to approach the situation.

Why are creditors willing to negotiate?

You might be surprised to learn that creditors are not as stubborn as one would think. although they may appear unwilling at first, they do prefer to negotiate rather than risk you taking more drastic debt relief measures. Creditors stand to lose more money when you file for bankruptcy or settle your debts for less than is owed, which is why they ultimately do become willing to negotiate your debt payments to some extent. Debt negotiations allow the creditors to maintain some level of control over the situation without risking the loss of any more of their money than necessary.

Will all my debts need to be negotiated?

The best thing about debt negotiation is its flexibility. Unlike other forms of debt relief, you can decide which debts to negotiate and which to leave as they are. When you file for bankruptcy or settle your debts, all of the debts get lumped into one. This leaves you with little option for repaying debts outside of these processes and requires you to treat them all equally.

Are my assets at risk?

While you can never be 100 percent free from the risk of asset seizure and liquidation, you can rest assured that one thing does protect your assets; debt repayment. As long as you are making some payment towards your debts, creditors cannot seize your property. However, secured debts are more risky and usually require a more sophisticated negotiation than an unsecured debt needs. The reason is that unsecured debts do not hold any asset as collateral and creditors would be required to obtain a court order to seize your assets. Therefore, negotiating with unsecured debt creditors is much easier and can better protect your assets as long as payments are being made.

Can I negotiate debts myself?

The short answer: sure. However, you may want to take care when attempting to resolve debts alone with your creditor. Many people find that creditors are unwilling and uncaring about their financial situation. Finding reputable representation, either through a third party debt negotiation company or a debt lawyer, can maximize your chances at successful negotiations.

When you negotiate, how do you cringe? Or better yet, do you cringe when you negotiate? Cringing, (an expression that conveys a shocked state of emotion)can be a very effective tool and thus a good strategy to employ when negotiating. When negotiating, regardless of how good the first offer, or subsequent offer is, cringe.

Cringing during a negotiation is a way to send a verbal and/or nonverbal message that indicates you are not satisfied with what has been proposed. It also sets the stage to imply that your opponents offer is being perceived as unreasonable and needs to be enhanced. Depending upon the degree of the cringe, the message conveyed can be mild, strong, or downright indignant.

A nonverbal cringe, is a way to probe an offer, without saying a word. The reason cringing is such a good strategy is due to the perception of your opponent. At the point of your cringe, your opponent is not exactly sure of your perception to her offer, but she knows its not favorable.Nevertheless, she doesn’t know to what degree you are dissatisfied with her offer. Thus, if you cringe when an offer is made and observe the perception of it, by your opponent, you glimpse her inner perspective, while projecting your position.

Understand the fact that while cringing can be nonverbal, it can also be verbal. It takes a verbal form when you say something like, Are you for real?, You’ve got to be kidding, right?, or do something as simple as just laugh at an offer.

Note: When you cringe, don’t give direction as to how far your opponents offer is from where you would like it to be. At the point of the cringe, you don’t want to give insight into how close or how far apart you are. One of the spill-over benefits of your cringe is to get your opponent to negotiate against himself. The hope is that he will better the offer without you having to put anything else up. The point of the matter is,in some situations, non savvy negotiators will react to your cringe by making a better offer. In essence, they will start negotiating against themselves, which in turn will enhance your position.

When using the cringing strategy with savvy negotiators,understand your message will still be conveyed, but you may not get a reaction from that person. That person understands how the cringing strategy is used and thus she is less apt to react to it. If that is the case, use silence to get her to probe for additional information. After she probes for your perception of the offer, simply state, You have to do better.

Nevertheless, when you cringe during a negotiation, your message will still be sent, be your opponent a savvy negotiator or a non-savvynegotiator. The thought that you are not 100% satisfied with the offer will be conveyed. Use the cringing strategy when you negotiate and do not be overly concerned about the outcome. If you use a nonverbal cringe and the deal starts to go astray, you can always say your expression was misperceived. Do not be afraid to use cringing when negotiating. You can’t/wont lose what you don’t have… and everything will be right with the world.

The negotiation lessons are…

• Always cringe when negotiating. By doing so, you will receive invaluable information about your opponents position. After cringing, be very observant to how this strategy has been received and perceived. Depending upon how badly your opponent needs/wants the deal, you will know when this tactic is reaching the outer limits of its usefulness. When it does, stop using it. Don’t blow the deal by overusing it.
• Never be afraid to cringe for fear of losing a deal. If your opponent is as firm in his offer as to be immobile and you want a better deal, be prepared to go somewhere else to get it.

As he walked past an unseen man lying on the ground that he could not see, he heard someone exclaim, “he looks like he’s dying!” He thought to himself, “I’m uncertain of what to do. Others seem to be handling this. I’m not going to get involved.” He later discovered that unseen man was his father.

Are you aware of when you fall prey to the first enemy of uncertainty in a negotiation (You’re always negotiating)? Do you know what that is? The first enemy of uncertainty in a negotiation is the emotions, actions, and reactions you engage in, based on what those around you are doing or do. The opening statement highlights that point. The first enemy of uncertainty is doubt.

When you’re in an environment and you’re not sure of what to do, you seek direction from others in the environment; you may do this in a quiet mindset to assuage your mind of the lack of direction it’s offering you. Your uncertainty is the driver that’s not sure of where to go, so you seek the opinions and insights of others to direct you. Thus, by observing their actions or reactions, you gain a sense of what you might do.

There’s nothing inherently wrong with following the lead of the other negotiator; you can obtain great insights from doing so. The challenge lies in when you should lead from the front, lead from behind, or allow him to lead. If you’re in a leader position up to that point, relinquishing the lead may seem or feel tenuous. You may even feel that your lack of direction is splayed for all to see, which might call your perceived leadership into question. If such is the case, realize that uncertainty has crept into your mind. The way you deal with it will determine the direction you take in the negotiation. Don’t be mentally constrained by such a thought. Here are a few things to be aware of.

1. You’re more likely to be influenced into some form of action based on where you see yourself in relation to the other negotiator (i.e. superior, in a controlling position, inferior, etc.)

2. Based on what’s occurred prior to the point of uncertainty, you may be more or less circumspective. Be aware of this because it too will impact your perception and the actions you engage in.

3. While you’re in a stage of mental siege, take note of what the other negotiator is doing. In particular, note the degree that he studies your actions. If he cues off of your actions, he may be wondering about your position or to what degree you’re contemplating his. If you sense the latter, don’t relieve him of his quandary. You can use that time to think about your next move.

Here’s the point. When you’re in a negotiation, at the first sign of uncertainty, stop and think. Don’t be mentally belabored by the perception of pending doom, or the fear of looking stupid. When it comes to uncertainty, we seek the leadership of others to lead us, or we can call upon our prior actions for that purpose. To combat uncertainty, know which source to choose.

When you heighten your sense of awareness about uncertainty, you’ll have greater insight into how to control it. Controlling it will be the key that unlocks the blockade where uncertainty lurks. That will allow you to banish the enemy of uncertainty, which is doubt… and everything will be right with the world.

Remember, you’re always negotiating!

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